I don’t normally post movie reviews, but Cloverfield had a unique effect on me..
In summary: Cloverfield is the first movie I’ve ever seen that I wish I hadn’t.
It’s not that it was a bad movie… it wasn’t. It was well directed, the acting was neutral-positive, and the special effects were as to be expected in the age of CG. Furthermore, in the one area the “plot” could have taken a really cheap out, they didn’t.
In the end, though, Cloverfield wasn’t a movie. There was little-to-no story, little-to-no character development (that which you learn about the characters in the first 10 minutes stays consistent throughout), no real storyline to follow. The ending of the movie was pretty much given away in the first 10 seconds.
The images of destruction in New York were personally unwelcome, but not a causal factor in my dismissal of this film. Having seen first-hand the collapse of one of the Twin Towers, I didn’t really need to see the Woolworth Building collapse, too. They made a very realistic plume of street-filling dust that was just like the WTC collapse, and I’m sure the CG folks must have used the 9/11 destruction to model their own.
The movie had zero emotional pull. No rah rah, no rooting, no HOLY CRAP, nothing. Even after a crappy movie, I feel kind of mad about seeing it. Or after an action movie, I feel thirty seconds of ROCK ON before forgetting the movie existed. Cloverfield left me with nothing whatsoever. Not even the nausea that supposedly could be induced by the Blair Witch Project style of filming.
I guess all I can say is that Cloverfield is vaguely insulting… like someone you don’t really care about saying shit about you behind your back, and you don’t find out until years later. You’re like “Well, that’s silly. Why am I using my memory to hold this data?”
Love to all. Even you, JJ.
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Funny. You’re the second New Yorker I blog-know who’s given Cloverfield a meh or worse review. Good to know so when my kids want to get it on satellite I can tell them that it’s crap and why don’t we rent something else.
Thanks for saving me the trouble. I’d never even heard of the movie until yesterday. Yeah, I’m really on top of pop culture.
I can’t even watch the intro to most movies (the zoom in/out on the roller coasters? GAH!) I never bothered to see Blair Witch for that very reason. I didn’t expect to see this one, either.
I’ve heard both GREAT and MEH, but very few were overly excited about it.
I think I’ll save my energy for Rambo.
Yeah, but wasn’t Lizzy Caplan HAWTT?!?!
(Confession: I haven’t seen the movie I’m just a little bit in love with Lizzy Caplan.)
You make the 5th person I’ve known (personally or in blogland) that has given this a thumbs-down. I think I’ll pass.